Santhos Pill

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since Jul 18, 2005
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Recent posts by Santhos Pill

Hi all

I'm getting following error
ERROR at line 4:
ORA-06550: line 4, column 16:
PLS-00302: component 'FUNCTION' must be declared
ORA-06550: line 4, column 3:
PL/SQL: Statement ignored
What is the issue with the following code ? It works well if I don't use username to access tables or procedures anything?

More Mallu Taak!

One of my mallu friend used to say "I dold my fader to get de gey". He meant "I told my father to get the key".

In a Trivandrum college, a Tamilian professor asked the Peon to get him "chaakkh" for chalk indeed. The poor guy went places and got him after 1 hour jute mattress which you would call in Malayalam chaakk! Malayalees call chalk as choke !

When asked a mallu why there are signals in the junction, he replied that it is there so that he can sell newspapers. These jokes show how industrous a mallu is!

When Neil Armstrong first landed in the moon, the only thing he could find there was a mallu's chaaya kada (tea shop)!

Why did the old mallu go to co-ledge. He went to co-ledge to get some no-ledge !

Hemant and his dad went to purchase a PC. They met one of his mallu colleagues and asked for his opinion. He told them to go to the other lane & find "pc weld". We went there and found no such shop. They searched the entire market thinking that the guy was disoriented.
After about 45 minutes of looking high-n-low Hemant said "let's go back to the same lane. Maybe it's a small shop with a small board", & there staring back at them was a big board "pc world"!

A professor of Engg. Graphics in our engineering college, had a hilarious hold of English. When he wanted fresh air in our labs, he would instruct one of the students to "open the doors of the windows and let the atmosphere come in"!



Put the wind into the ball (because the football had to be blown up)!

There are so many Malayalees in the air force that it is zimbly called the india nair force !!!

Why did the mallu go to coliage? to gain some know-liage.
Why did the same mallu go to the demple? to 'bray'
why did the mallu go to the the 'soo' (zoo)? zimply!



The oo-fice was closed on o-gust dwendy secand because of a bendh colled by congress.

You know he/she is a mallu when their name ends with "ju". Riju, biju, aju, liju, saju, raju, renju, tinju, sanju, anju, manju!
You know he/she is a mallu when their name ends with "nu". Manu, binu, sinu, rinu, anu, vinu, linu, jinu, tinu etc.!

You need to know little of Kannada and Malayalam to appreciate this: One newly arrived Malayali in Bangalore goes to a bus stop and asks a person waiting there in supposed to be Kannada illi buss indhiraa nagar hogumoo?
the person replys hoganam !!

Why was the mallu not included in the football team?
ans : he was not selected because whenever he gets a corner, he sets up a tea shop there!
Malayalam if spelt either ways is the same, so you never know if they are coming in or going out.

What degree did the mallu get after completing law college?
ans :yell yell bee
Why did a mallu buy an yer-ticket ?
ans :to go to gelf to yern money !
What does mallu wants to convey when he/she says "We are the most impotent people in india" ?
ans : He/she means important.

What does mallu girls wants to show you when she says "Come to my home, I'll show you my hole" ?
ans : Actually, she wanted to show you her hall (leaving room)



Mallu Interview!

A "Mallu" female (from the heart of Kerala) went for a job interview for the post of a SECRETARY. When the manager saw the Mallu's colorful attire and gold and well oiled uncombed jet black hair, his mind was screaming "NOT THIS WOMAN." Nevertheless, he still had to entertain the Mallu. So he told her "If You could form a sentence using the words that I give you, then may be I will give you a chance! The words are GREEN, PINK, YELLOW, BLUE, WHITE, PURPLE and BLACK."

The enthusiastic Mallu lady thought for a while and said: "I hear the phone GREEN GREEN GREEN, then I go and PINK up the phone,I say YELLOW..... BLUE's that? WHITE did you say? Aiye yenda amme, Wrong number.. ... Don't PURPLELY disturb pxeople and don't call BLACK, yokeeyy? Thank you."

The Manager fainted!


The plane in which two mallus who were traveling crashed over an ocean. Once in the water other passengers swam for floats to keep themselves afloat but the Mallus swam towards the cargo portion collecting lemons to make lemon juice.


Why do Mallus wear Mundu? Because in the Monsoon flood the mundu can be tucked upwards as the water rises.


What can be done to put a Mallu to dilemma ? Offer him fish curry and kaLLu (toddy) and ask him to choose only one of them.




English Pronunciation of Malayalees

What processor does a Mallu have in his PC?
A Pendium

What does a Mallu do to run for elections in Hongkong?
Change his name from Thankachan to Than Ka Chan.

What does a Mallu do to run for elections in England?
Change his name from Vaideswaran to Vaides Waran.

What will a mallu reply when asked "Are there any mosquitoes in your house?
Plendy

Why did the Malayalee crossed the road?
Simbly.

Where did the malayalee study?
In the kollage.

What did the Malayalee do when the plane caught fire?
He JEMBED out of the VINDOW...

Why did he go to Rome?
To hear POPE music..

Why did the Malayalee cross the road?
To join the union on the other side.

What does a Malayalee do when he has to stand for election in Delhi?
He changes his name. Madhavan to M A DHAWAN.

What does a Malayalee do to stand for elections in New York?
He changes his name. Karunakaran to KEVIN CURREN

What would you call a Mallu martial arts expert?
A MalayaLEE

Why does a Malayalee go to a temple?
Zimply to Bray.

How does a baby mallu cry?
"visa visa visa visa . . ."

Why did the Malayalee buy an air ticket?
To go to DUBAIH ..simbly to meet his UNGLE and AUNDY in GELF.

Who was Bruce Lee's best friend in Malayasia?
Malaya LEE

How does a malayalee spell Malayalam?
YAMM - YAY - YELL - YAY - WHY - YAY - YELL -YUMM.

What did the Mallu scientist do on reaching the moon?
He tested the soil if it was fit to plant tapioca.

Why do Mallus wear Mundu?
Because in the Monsoon flood the mundu can be tucked upwards as the water rises.

What happens when a bakery in Kerala is named after a gerrl called Anu?
Its named 'Anus Bakery'.

Why is industrial productivity so low in Kerala?
Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting, folding and re-tying the lungi.

What is the tax on Mallu's income called?
IngumDax

What is Malayali management graduate called?
A Yem Bee Yae.



Where is the only place in the world where a Malayalee doesn't work hard?
- Keralam (Kerala)





17 years ago
Play some malyalam or kannada movies. I bet , not only him but neighbors also will run away.
17 years ago

Please advice him.




I do not know if he is in this forum. So can not advise him.
One advise to you,
Play some Gujarati songs....
17 years ago
One of my room mate in Banglore used to watch malyalam movies always.
My God I used to go creazy. I used to feel like committing suicide.
Guess what I did ?

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One day I locked him inside flat. After that he never watched any malyalam movie when I'm at home.
17 years ago
Hi All
What is the difference between ps -a and netstat -a commands in Linux ?

Thank you

SP
18 years ago