http://www.mousetech.com/EJBWizard.html Of course, I'm prejudiced, since I created it and therefore it reflects my needs - though I'm always open to suggestions (It's open source, BTW).
Right now it runs standalone, but it was always intended to be able to hook into IDEs. I'm playing around with an Eclipse integration at the moment.
If money is no object, products with "Enterprise" in their name usually provide an integrated assist. They should, anyway, since many of them cost more than the computer you're using them on.
The secret of how to be miserable is to constantly expect things are going to happen the way that they are "supposed" to happen.
You can have faith, which carries the understanding that you may be disappointed. Then there's being a willfully-blind idiot, which virtually guarantees it.