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The Story of Dot-Com

Ranch Hand
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The Story of Dot-Com
In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com
did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. Now Dot Com was an
amazingly comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. And so she came
to be known as Amazon Dot Com.
One day, when the moon was full, and they were sleeping in the tent, Dot
said unto Abraham, "Why doth thou labor in the sun and travel far from town
to town with thy goods when thou can trade without ever leaving our tent?"
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of
a full camel load, but simply said, "How, Dear?"
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and also drums
in-between the towns to send messages saying what you have for sale. And
they will reply telling you which town will give you the best price for thy
goods. And the sale can be made on the drums and goods can be delivered by
Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the
drums. The drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all
the goods he had at the top price, without ever moving from his tent or from
the bed of his comely young wife.
And several young men did take to Dot Com's trading as greedy horseflies
take to camel dung. And they were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich
Dominican Siderites, or NERDS for short.
One day, Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel or, as it came to be
known "eBay." And he said, "We need a name that reflects what we are." And
Dot replied, "How about Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators?" "That's
it," exclaimed Abraham, "YAHOO!"
And lo, the land was feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening
sound of drums. And the VCs (Vulture Capitalists) came forward to feed on
the spoils of the land. And the money-lenders (bankers) feasted off the fat
of the land. And many peasants put their shekels from their
score-score-and-one Kabba (401k) into the making of the drums.
This success did arouse much greed and envy. A money-lender named Maccabia
did hide himself inside Abraham's drum and was accused of insider trading.
And it came to pass that one day, a seer who could see further and clearer
than his fellows said, " How many drums do we really need? I fear we are
making too many drums and hiring too many drummers. The whole enterprise
doth seem like the Great Pyramid of Giza (a pyramid scheme)."
And slowly, the drumming slowed down and it stopped. And there was much
weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.
All this while, no one had noticed that the real riches had gone to the drum
maker, one Brother William of Gates, who had bought up every drum company in
the land. And indeed his drums would work only with the drumheads and
drumsticks made by his company.
"The Hood"
Posts: 8521
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