what being in a right old two and eight means

(unless you are British!)
It's cockney rhyming slang for 'state'. Usually describes being in tough situations, like in, 'He was in a right old two and eight having missed the deadline'.
Here's an interesting collection of such slang, and their origins. Go here:
http://www.businessballs.com/index.htm and click on 'cockney rhyming slang' in the left frame.