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cow's milk

 
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hi all,
i wanna drink cow's milk.but i could'nt.because when i start drinking,my mind gets a picture of cow's asshole.i remember cow's under area when i drink milk.
but i m having a deep desire and need to drink milk..what 2 do?
basha
 
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That indicates your brain is still in childhood and you are not fit to do any kind of job let alone programming.One of my frind was also suffering from similar kind of diesease,call it cowmania.He was almost mentally disabled.Finally doctors advised him to eat cowdung in miniscule amount with daily intake.In 10 days he was normal.But for this to happen,cow's intake should be proper .I hope you will soon getaway with this disease,sorry syndrome
 
basha khan
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That indicates your brain is still in childhood and you are not fit to do any kind of job let alone programming.


but childrens are cool while drinking milk. i dont seen any kid having my probm.childrens r drinking milk than adults ..is'nt it?
basha
 
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I feel sorry for you ! Please consult some doctor so that you can overcome the cowmania that you are suffering from.
 
mister krabs
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It shows a problem with biology. Milk doesn't come from a cow's butt. It comes from a cow's teats. Next time you want to drink a glass of milk, don't think about the cow's butt, think about your girlfriend's breasts!
 
basha khan
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thomas poul is OK. but not perfect. i need a perfect answer.anybody having knowledge?
 
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thomas poul is OK. but not perfect.
Mmmm, irony...
 
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Basha, I fear you are the victim of a rare psychological disorder called bovirectophobia. No doubt induced when, as an infant, your mother, while milking the family cow, placed you on the ground behind the bovine and the animal dropped a fresh load of cow pie all over you. Now, you associate a cow's ass with milk. I hear the only cure is to stick your head up a cow's ass and allow a dominatrix to smear limburger cheese all over your naked body. But hey, at least you can still drink beer!
 
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I hear the only cure is to stick your head up a cow's ass and allow a dominatrix to smear limburger cheese all over your naked body.


That's prehistoric. Nowdays, bovirectophobia is actually easily treated, -- they give you morphein and put you in a movie theater where they show a cow's ass on the screen over and over again. Gradually, you aquire a "feel good" -> "cow's ass" reflex. After one week treatment, milk is your favorite drink!
 
basha khan
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Hi all,
michel morris solution is good. but i cant do it now.becuse my nose does'nt have much capacity as morris's.but i suggest that to morris itself when morris gets the desease..
no perfect answers yet..i think nobody had these kind of probs here in ranch.it's a matter of inexperience only.
a good solution i got from one of my collegues is like konorov's solution.i m showing that below.he told,
--------------------------------------------------
take a very small amount of milk first in a glass and mix with water.try to drink this mixture,defenetely the problm 'll occur,but the effect 'll be minimam.because the mixture contains less amount of milk.try this for one week.
increase the amount of milk in weekly basis.
by continuesely practicing this routine,the thickest milk in the world can be drinkable within two months..
--------------------------------------------------
the solution looks good..but i suspect this solution may cause some phychological problmos because i've to try hard to change my default mental settings ..so i m hesistant to try this
anybody having a perfect cure?..
basha
 
Michael Morris
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michel morris solution is good. but i cant do it now.becuse my nose does'nt have much capacity as morris's.


Wimp :roll:
 
whippersnapper
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Why not just switch to soy beverage?
My current favorite brand is Belsoy.
 
basha khan
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Hi morris,

michel morris solution is good. but i cant do it now.becuse my nose does'nt have much capacity as morris's.


smelling hard foul smells may damage nose.ur solution requires that..cow's ass+cheese ..it's too much 4 me.i coul'nt handle that much ..
i m having a deep desire towards milk.hard to replace.i need GOOD solutions.
basha
 
John Smith
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basha khan: i m having a deep desire towards milk.
According to Sigmund Freud, craving for milk is the manifestation of the deep seeded desires to have sex with your mother. You suffered a great trauma at the time of birth when you were separated from your mother, and subconciously you are trying to find a way to reunite with her. Perhaps the cowboys could do some public psychotherapy sessions for you to hopefully fix you up. We need to know a little bit more about you:
-- What do you think makes more sense, a vagina or a penis?
-- Did you dress in your sister's clothes?
-- Do you dream about falling from the cliff, fighting a war, or menstruating?
-- What's your position on the progressive taxation in US?
Eugene.
 
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Originally posted by basha khan:
i wanna drink cow's milk.but ... when i start drinking,my mind gets a picture of cow's asshole.


Does the same thing happen when you drink milkshake? What about other dairy products?
When I eat butter or cheese, I get a mental picture of a cow on a pogostick.
 
basha khan
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originally posted by Kononov

According to Sigmund Freud, craving for milk is the manifestation of the deep seeded desires to have sex with your mother


according to freud,all milkloving peoples are motherfuckers?.if so,a precautionary warning should be necessory on every milk containers like,
WARNING ESIRE TO OR DRINKING MILK MAY SERIOUSELY EFFECT UR MOTHER
i think Kononov never drunk milk because konorov knows it.or ?
basha
 
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Well, one thing is for sure, I wont think about this thread when I drink milk next time.
Its getting dirty in here! :roll:
 
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Wild things happen in MD over a weekend.....
 
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This thread has a definite Chongistic flair about it. The Great One would be proud.
[ April 14, 2003: Message edited by: Jason Menard ]
 
John Smith
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Chongistic? That's a new word for me, and I couldn't find it in the dictionary. Google didn't return any results, either. What the hell is it?
 
Thomas Paul
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Of or relating to Johnson Chong, one of the few people who managed to get himself banned from JavaRanch. He was noted for posts that made little or no sense and tended to ramble.
 
John Smith
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Thomas Paul: Of or relating to Johnson Chong, one of the few people who managed to get himself banned from JavaRanch. He was noted for posts that made little or no sense and tended to ramble.
One can be banned from JavaRanch for not making sense and rambling? For not making sense to whom? I don't want to bring the old debate back, -- enough was said, -- just want to know about the current policy.
[ April 14, 2003: Message edited by: Eugene Kononov ]
 
Jason Menard
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As I remember it, the final straw for the Chongster was solicitation of advice concerning how to commit rape.
 
Thomas Paul
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Eugene, no one ever objected to Chong's ramblings. It was when he started soliciting advice on how to rape his girlfriend that it was decided JavaRanch would be a better place without him.
You can read some of JC's other stuff here:
https://coderanch.com/forums/posts/listByUser/00011119
[ April 14, 2003: Message edited by: Thomas Paul ]
 
John Smith
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Jason Menard: As I remember it, the final straw for the Chongster was solicitation of advice concerning how to commit rape.
And how does it relate to this thread? I mean, what doesn't make sense and what is "rambling" in this thread? The initial post? The first response containing the explicite sexual reference? The "King Oedipus" by Sofokles? The "Desire Under the Elms" play by Eugene O'Neill? The Freud's "Interpretation of Dreams"? My interpretation of Freud's "Interpretations.."? Or Jason who misinterpreted my interpretation of Freud "Interpretations"?
[ April 14, 2003: Message edited by: Eugene Kononov ]
 
Jim Yingst
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And how does it relate to this thread?
The banning and the rape post aren't related to this thread (unless basha is really chong). However the initial post, and subsequent posts by basha, are reminiscent of Chong's style because of (a) the severe confusion about where milk comes from, and (b) the gratuitous use of profanity. Neither is going to get basha banned, although the profanity may well get edited if basha doesn't start using some sense.
 
John Smith
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JY: The banning and the rape post aren't related to this thread (unless basha is really chong).
Thanks for that clarification, Jim. I thought the reference was to me and that people completely lost their common sense. I guess I misinterpreted it in that MD madness. Peace.
 
Michael Morris
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Gee, and I thought Eugene and I were trying to help the guy work thru a psycosis induced by some childhood trauma.
 
Jim Yingst
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Maybe so, Michael. Unfortunately some of us have gotten used to having our chains yanked - it breeds a certain amount of cynicism, for better or worse.
 
Michael Morris
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Perhaps my previous post was a bit too subtle. Let me be explicit, if Basha ain't yankin' our chain, then Eugene and I may be in serious trouble for practicing psychiatry without a license. Well, I'm pretty sure Eugene isn't licensed.
 
John Smith
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MM: Perhaps my previous post was a bit too subtle.
Hey, go practice your subtlety in West Texas!
 
Jim Yingst
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Perhaps my previous post was a bit too subtle.
Curses, foiled by that Texan subtlety again.
[This may seem redundant now that I've seen Eugene's response, but I composed it independently, so there.]
 
Michael Morris
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Hey, go practice your subtlety in West Texas!


Are you callin' me a necrozoophile?
 
John Smith
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Originally posted by Michael Morris:
Are you callin' me a necrozoophile?


The necrophilia and zoophilia threads didn't seem to draw much interest, -- I assume most ranchers are the puritans from New England and they kinda disapprove anything non-Victorian. Dendrophilia might be a milder form of sexual deviancy. You probably would not find it in the dictionary, so I'll give you a definition, -- it's when you ... you know ... do it with the trees. Any practicing ranchers? But what really makes me scratch my head is formicophilia (also not in the dictionary, -- it's the use of insects for sexual purposes). I mean, how could I possibly use the insects?
Very puzzled,
Eugene.
 
Michael Morris
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You probably would not find it in the dictionary, so I'll give you a definition, -- it's when you ... you know ... do it with the trees.


I seem to recall a poem from my youth:
When I was younger and in my prime
I used to jack off all the time
But now I'm older and got more sense
I use a knothole in the fence!


I mean, how could I possibly use the insects?


You never heard of a needle-dick-bug-fucker?
 
John Smith
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That's it. I am moving to Texas to open my mind. This New England clam chowder poisoned my brain, -- take me in the Lone Star!
 
Michael Morris
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That's it. I am moving to Texas to open my mind.


OK but you need to change that slavic moniker. How about Billy Eugene Cornpone?
 
basha khan
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Hi all,
I like imagination.without bounderies.....
i made a thread which can invoke funny imagination.all kind of imagination is possible in replys but some wonderfull and atristic replys are also possible,like davinchi's 'monolisa'.
what is 'monolisa'??.can it provide anything in ur pockets?.NO.it'll only provide some enjoyment in ur mind.it's only a good imagination from davichi,but people enjoyed it a lot.do u know?.all good artwork made in paper is really not on 'GOOD THINGS'.they made all things as their topics.
like so my thread also offers some 'WONDERFULL AND ARTISTIC' imagination all can enjoy with it..
my intention is pure phychoanalytic fun.what's wrong?.
basha
 
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Originally posted by basha khan:
Hi all,
I like imagination.without bounderies.........
my intention is pure phychoanalytic fun.what's wrong?.
basha


Still you can't get away with the fact that you are suffering from CAS(Cow A** Syndrome).
 
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