An old guy in a rest home gets up one day and realizes it's his birthday. He walks out into the common room with all the rest of the old farts and announces to his friend Vic, "Hey, Vic, today's my birthday. How old do you think I am?"
Vic says, "Well, I'd put you at 75".
The old fart says, "Ha! I'm 80 years old".
Vic says, "Gosh".
The old fart continues until he sees an old lady sitting in a rocking chair. He says to her, "Madam, today is my birthday. How old do you think I am?".
The old lady leans forward and pulls down the old guy's zipper. She reaches in and grabs his pecker and gives it a couple of good squeezes. Then she looks back at the old guy and says, "you're 80 years old!"
The old guy is amazed. He says, "You could tell my age by doing that?!"
The old lady says, "Naw, I heard you tell your friend."
[ July 25, 2003: Message edited by:
Paul Wheaton ]