posted 19 years ago
Hi
I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2005. Because of your kindness: I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.
I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS. I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer.
I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear
that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.
I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number and I get a phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.
I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and urine. When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, drug me then take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.
I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. (Funny that girl, she's been 7 since 1993...) I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made expecting the $15,000 that
Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their special e-mail program would arrive soon.
My free Nokia phone never arrived and neither did the free passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland. Tired of calling divya singh (Siemens employee) who needs help for her hubby suffering from Lung cellular cancer especially when she was not married!!
IMPORTANT NOTE:
If you do not send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will crap on your head today at 10:30 pm.
It was the precise time that sold me.
