I understand your frustration - in earlier versions of Eclipse getting it and the JBoss plugins working was not easy. But things have gotten much better recently.
For Eclipse, at
http://www.eclipse.org/downloads/ download "Eclipse IDE for
Java EE Developers".
After downloading, unpack and run it. Then in Help | Software Updates, on the Available Software tab click Add Site and enter one of the URLs from
http://www.jboss.org/tools/download. I recommend either Stable Updates "JBoss Tools 3.0 :: Eclipse 3.4.2" or Development Updates "JBoss Tools 3.0 :: Eclipse 3.4.2" (right-click on the link in your browser and select the copy URL menu option). Then back on the Eclipse Software Updates dialog click Install.
Here are the JBoss Tools docs:
http://docs.jboss.org/tools/3.0.1.GA/ The Getting Started guide contains full installation instructions (section 1.4.2)