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More Dating Design Patterns Questions

 
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Hello Solveig (who fears the magnetic fascination of the JavaRanch),
Here are some more inebriated questions:
  • Why don't you respond to posts here?
  • Is there a study guide to accompany your book?
  • Are there any patterns applicable to married people?


  • Patiently awaiting your response,
     
    author
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    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:
    Why don't you respond to posts here?


    Have some patience, young grasshopper!
    Book promotions start on tuesday; he has still some time to show up.

    Are there any patterns applicable to married people?


    The Singleton pattern?
     
    author
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    Are there any patterns applicable to married people?

    The Chain of Responsibility?
     
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    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:
    Hello Solveig (who fears the magnetic fascination of the JavaRanch),
    Here are some more inebriated questions:

  • Why don't you respond to posts here?


  • Well, I posted some chapters of a similar book but there was Upheaval, Disbelief, and possibly Psoriasis at my suggestion of making a woman waffles for breakfast. I clarified that this was for a primarily American audience and thus if waffles were the equivalent of saying "may I come up to your room, bouncy bouncy?" elsewhere then naturally one should not employ them. But after that there seemed to be Little Interest in that book so I returned my attention to editing that actual Real Original Dating Patterns Written By the Gang of Four in College, "Dating Design Patterns" being discussed today.

  • Is there a study guide to accompany your book?


  • Not yet, sadly. But I'm working on a big honkin' certification program so perhaps then Sun will buy me out and we can have a SCDCDAS industry.

  • Are there any patterns applicable to married people?


  • Patiently awaiting your response,


    There are several, but in the grand triangle of FEATURES, QUALITY, and TIMELINE, I cut features. Those are in the Structural patterns category and include Preemptive Contradog which is a complex but manageable system of ways to stay out of the dog house. There is also a Resource Delivery category, on gift giving patterns.
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Dating Design Patterns", for the geek who has everything.
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    [ December 02, 2003: Message edited by: Solveig Laura Haugland ]
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Have some patience, young grasshopper!
    Book promotions start on tuesday; he has still some time to show up.


    I'm a GIRL!!! ;>
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Dating Design Patterns", for the geek who has everything.
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    [ December 02, 2003: Message edited by: Solveig Laura Haugland ]
     
    pioneer
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    Book promotions start on tuesday; he has still some time to show up.

    It is She.
    [ December 02, 2003: Message edited by: Pradeep Bhat ]
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Originally posted by Lasse Koskela:
    The Chain of Responsibility?


    Chain of Responsibility is actually an antipattern which results in everything eventually being your fault.
    Antipatterns also include:
    Factory -- Dating the same type of woman over and over again, and/or turning every woman into the same type.
    Singleton -- You�re convinced that there�s only one woman for you, thus you stay with her even though she drives you crazy.
    Builder -- Mental escape from a bad relationship through constant home maintenance projects ~ Some controversy surrounds this one, since Grady originally presented it as a positive pattern, one in which one does home maintenance project to create a debt situation, in the range beer to dinner.

    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    "I laughed so hard I dropped my copy in the bathtub." ~ Alistair Cockburn, author of "Agile Software Development"
    "Dating Design Patterns", for the geek who has everything.
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    Available now at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's [soon]
    And from Solveig at www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns
     
    pioneer
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    Not yet, sadly. But I'm working on a big honkin' certification program so perhaps then Sun will buy me out and we can have a SCDCDAS industry.


    *laughs!* Oh, I can imagine this one now... but given how most of us are, wouldn't that require a low percentage for passing? *ducks before he gets lynched*
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    This is just yet another certification test that absolutely requires a study guide -- and is difficult but it'll make you a much more desirable resource. ;>
    Given extensive reading of "Dating Design Patterns," extensive work through the no doubt forthcoming "Head First Dating Design Patterns" study guide, and of course numerous practice tests ;> and perhaps a cattle drive (not sure who would be in charge of that on JavaRanch?), we'd have people logging on saying "My test administrator Inga, who used to be on the Swedish Bikini Team, gave me a 98% !!!"
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Look out, OOPSLA! Here comes daddy!" ~ Ken Arnold, coauthor of The Java Programming Language
    "Dating Design Patterns"
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    And www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns

    Originally posted by Theodore Casser:

    *laughs!* Oh, I can imagine this one now... but given how most of us are, wouldn't that require a low percentage for passing? *ducks before he gets lynched*


    [ December 02, 2003: Message edited by: Solveig Laura Haugland ]
     
    Howard Kushner
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    HK: Is there a study guide to accompany your book?
    SLH: Not yet, sadly. But I'm working on a big honkin' certification program so perhaps then Sun will buy me out and we can have a SCDCDAS industry.


    Okay Lady Sol,
    Here's an offer you might want to consider. Since I got into writing certification study guides recently, and plan to start work on a new one this month (title TBD), I will be more than happy to write one for Dating Design Patterns. The only catch is that we will have to substitute JRC (JavaRanch Certified) for SC (Sun Certified) DCDAS. One question still remains in my alleged mind. What does DCDAS stand for?
     
    Theodore Casser
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    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:

    Okay Lady Sol,
    Here's an offer you might want to consider. Since I got into writing certification study guides recently, and plan to start work on a new one this month (title TBD), I will be more than happy to write one for Dating Design Patterns.


    Ooh, if you could use a co-author (even a novice), I'd love to join in on this! (My girlfriend would approve of my doing "work-related stuff" outside of work hours. Scariness abounds.)

    The only catch is that we will have to substitute JRC (JavaRanch Certified) for SC (Sun Certified) DCDAS. One question still remains in my alleged mind. What does DCDAS stand for?


    I'm wondering there too, since I can't make any fun acronyms with it...
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Hey, you're very welcome to write that Cert guide. ;> Can I assume that this means you'll be joining the Reference Implementation team? It's being headed up in Sweden but I imagine it's easily international.
    JavaRanch Certified Dating Patternist and Seducer is more or less what I had in mind. Let's see....
    JARC DA JAvaRanch Certificed Dating Architect? Though of course one's female friends can also be dating architects (see the architecture chapter, plus Bridge Interpreter and Mediator patterns).

    JARC DAME JAvaRanch Certificed Dating Architect, Male Edition? ;> Hmm, cute acronym but it doesn't quite work for what it represents.
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Look out, OOPSLA! Here comes daddy!" ~ Ken Arnold, coauthor of The Java Programming Language
    "Dating Design Patterns"
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    And www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns

    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:

    Okay Lady Sol,
    Here's an offer you might want to consider. Since I got into writing certification study guides recently, and plan to start work on a new one this month (title TBD), I will be more than happy to write one for Dating Design Patterns. The only catch is that we will have to substitute JRC (JavaRanch Certified) for SC (Sun Certified) DCDAS. One question still remains in my alleged mind. What does DCDAS stand for?

     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    A writing team already! Hey, Gary Cornell's new pubs company needs titles (or rather, I assume they do). Maybe he'd like to take on the JARC product line. ;>
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Look out, OOPSLA! Here comes daddy!" ~ Ken Arnold, coauthor of The Java Programming Language
    "Dating Design Patterns"
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    And www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns

    Originally posted by Theodore Casser:

    I'm wondering there too, since I can't make any fun acronyms with it...

     
    Theodore Casser
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    A writing team already! Hey, Gary Cornell's new pubs company needs titles (or rather, I assume they do). Maybe he'd like to take on the JARC product line. ;>


    Woohoo! Encouragement! I'm ready to help when/where I can.
     
    mister krabs
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    I'm a GIRL!!! ;>

    And a very pretty one if I might add!
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    There you go, quoting Knuth, just trying to seduce me. ;>
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Look out, OOPSLA! Here comes daddy!" ~ Ken Arnold, coauthor of The Java Programming Language
    "Dating Design Patterns"
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    And www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns

    Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
    And a very pretty one if I might add!

     
    Howard Kushner
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    Hey, you're very welcome to write that Cert guide. ;> Can I assume that this means you'll be joining the Reference Implementation team? It's being headed up in Sweden but I imagine it's easily international.
    JavaRanch Certified Dating Patternist and Seducer is more or less what I had in mind. Let's see....
    JARC DA JAvaRanch Certificed Dating Architect? Though of course one's female friends can also be dating architects (see the architecture chapter, plus Bridge Interpreter and Mediator patterns).
    JARC DAME JAvaRanch Certificed Dating Architect, Male Edition? ;> Hmm, cute acronym but it doesn't quite work for what it represents.
    Solveig


    Ok. I suggest we proceed by defining roles, then the skills objectives (i.e. the skills required to perform those job roles). Catchy acronyms are always a good place to start.
    I'll start the ball rolling by suggesting three roles. Y'all can join in by helping explore possible skills objectives. Later we present it to jCert so neither IBM nor Sun is offended. I s'pose it's already too late for BEA.
    So here are my candidates for the entry, intermediate, and advanced roles:
  • JRCDPA JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Associate
  • JRCDPS JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Seducer
  • JRCDPD JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Demigod

  •  
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Oh, of course we need multiple levels. That way profitability lies! Right, Simon? ;>
    I'd say that in addition to those three that we have one for the women who are the essential advisors and architects; a woman can do some really great stuff on the fly that seems entirely natural to the target. (The pursued single woman.) Proxy? Architect? Mediator? Something like that.
    The exams could be multiple choice (associate), but for the upper level ones, Sylvan and the other companies would need to hire a whole bunch more test administrators!
    Solveig

    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:

    Ok. I suggest we proceed by defining roles, then the skills objectives (i.e. the skills required to perform those job roles). Catchy acronyms are always a good place to start.
    I'll start the ball rolling by suggesting three roles. Y'all can join in by helping explore possible skills objectives. Later we present it to jCert so neither IBM nor Sun is offended. I s'pose it's already too late for BEA.
    So here are my candidates for the entry, intermediate, and advanced roles:

  • JRCDPA JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Associate
  • JRCDPS JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Seducer
  • JRCDPD JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Demigod

  •  
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    Profitability?! Profitability, I don't know what you mean. Just wait and see if I get my way with the update to the architect certification. Then you'll see levels!
    But wait, we're getting off topic, tell me more about your schooldays...
    Interested,
    Simon
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    You flirtatious devil, you. We should go out dancing tonight.
    I'm thinking that for the medium and high level exam you have to do a verbal exam, of course, involving simple chitchat and connecting to up to five unknown women in an hour, without using Disinterested Requester of course which is powerful but not complex. (DI would probably be on the associate's exam but nothing else.) Then of course for the high level exam you have to do a full-day sample date and justify all moves afterwards with a panel of examiners. ;>
    Solveig
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Dating Design Patterns" for the Geek Who Has Everything
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com/order.html

    Originally posted by Simon Roberts:
    Profitability?! Profitability, I don't know what you mean. Just wait and see if I get my way with the update to the architect certification. Then you'll see levels!
    But wait, we're getting off topic, tell me more about your schooldays...
    Interested,
    Simon

     
    Howard Kushner
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    How kewl is this? You just never know who the you'll run into at the Big Moose Saloon!
    Simon, I already bought your book twice! I still highly recommend it: Click!
    Lady Sol, I am intrigued by the idea of gender specific patterns. Shucks, it's almost like linguistics for sake! I mean, at the end of the day a pattern language is a language, and no less a language than Java or Latin, woon'cha say? So don't we need masculine, feminine, and neuter flavored stuff? Somebody help me!!!
     
    Thomas Paul
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    There you go, quoting Knuth, just trying to seduce me. ;>

    The Knuth quotes don't work on my wife at all. I have to use them somewhere!
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Well, with all that, now you're getting into serious implementation stuff. I'm just the patterns girl. ;> Also I'm not so much an expert on what women should do to meet men, except that pretty much all you have to do is walk into the local JUG or LUG to get started.
    Solveig

    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:
    How kewl is this? You just never know who the you'll run into at the Big Moose Saloon!
    Simon, I already bought your book twice! I still highly recommend it: Click!
    Lady Sol, I am intrigued by the idea of gender specific patterns. Shucks, it's almost like linguistics for sake! I mean, at the end of the day a pattern language is a language, and no less a language than Java or Latin, woon'cha say? So don't we need masculine, feminine, and neuter flavored stuff? Somebody help me!!!

     
    Theodore Casser
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    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:

    So here are my candidates for the entry, intermediate, and advanced roles:

  • JRCDPA JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Associate
  • JRCDPS JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Seducer
  • JRCDPD JavaRanch Certified Dating Patterns Demigod


  • And the question becomes, are they prerequisites for each other, or can you simply take the exam for the higher level if you feel you can qualify? I think that maybe they ought to be prerequisites, but there ought to be other qualifications as well... hmmm.
    Also, there's the question of whether or not a single study guide for all three exams is best or if this ought to be broken up into volumes. I propose two guides - one for the associate exam, and one for the two more advanced. There are guys who will only go for the entry-level job and be satisfied...
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Originally posted by Theodore Casser:
    And the question becomes, are they prerequisites for each other, or can you simply take the exam for the higher level if you feel you can qualify? I think that maybe they ought to be prerequisites, but there ought to be other qualifications as well... hmmm.


    Mmm, I think they should definitely be prerequisites. You can perhaps "test out" by providing evidence of ability but the recommended approach is one two three. Perhaps the certification people can provide a week-long bootcamp to get through all three tests.

    Also, there's the question of whether or not a single study guide for all three exams is best or if this ought to be broken up into volumes. I propose two guides - one for the associate exam, and one for the two more advanced. There are guys who will only go for the entry-level job and be satisfied...


    I'm with you on that. Though once the writing begins and once the tests are created they might be so tricky, with complex questions about butt-shifting, that a volume for each might be necessary.
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Dating Design Patterns", for the geek who has everything.
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    Available now at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's
    And www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns
    "Look out OOPSLA! Here comes Daddy!" ~ Ken Arnold, coauthor of "The Java Programming Language"
     
    Theodore Casser
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    Certification bootcamps like that sound like fun... just have to figure out how to convince my boss to pay for it [and keep it secret from my girlfriend ].

    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:

    I'm with you on that. Though once the writing begins and once the tests are created they might be so tricky, with complex questions about butt-shifting, that a volume for each might be necessary.


    True 'dat. I'm still game for playing co-author though, no matter how hard it is - I'll just have to endure the writing and very thorough testing of the material!
    *whistles innocently*
    [ December 03, 2003: Message edited by: Theodore Casser ]
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Originally posted by Theodore Casser:
    [QB] Certification bootcamps like that sound like fun... just have to figure out how to convince my boss to pay for it [and keep it secret from my girlfriend ].



    Kathy, Bert, get Neal Baumann on the phone. We've got his next Geek Cruise.
    Solveig
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    gangofone@datingdesignpatterns.com
    "Dating Design Patterns", for the geek who has everything.
    www.datingdesignpatterns.com
    Available at SoftPro, Nerdbooks, and Powell's Technical Bookstore
    And www.cafepress.com/datingpatterns
    "Five days after receiving my copy, I awoke, hung over and disoriented, under Sun's J2EE booth at Comdex with a very friendly booth babe named Trixie. This book rocks!" ~ Bryan Basham, author of the forthcoming Head First Webby Stuff book
     
    Ilja Preuss
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    I'm a GIRL!!! ;>


    Ooops
    I'm soooo sorry. Is there a pattern in your book applicable for my now miserable situation? What do I do when I drop a clanger?
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    You realize that you're one of several million people who've made the same mistake and don't take it seriously at all. ;>
    Solveig

    Originally posted by Ilja Preuss:

    Ooops
    I'm soooo sorry. Is there a pattern in your book applicable for my now miserable situation? What do I do when I drop a clanger?


    [ December 03, 2003: Message edited by: Solveig Laura Haugland ]
     
    Ilja Preuss
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    You realize that you're one of several million people who've made the same mistake and don't take it seriously at all. ;>


    <sigh> But I *don't want to be* one of several million people - I want to be unique, outstanding!
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Originally posted by Ilja Preuss:

    <sigh> But I *don't want to be* one of several million people - I want to be unique, outstanding!


    Hmm, in that case you'll need to mistake me for a turtle, or sprout wings and go flying around singing selections from La Traviata. ;>
    solveig
     
    Howard Kushner
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:
    Well, with all that, now you're getting into serious implementation stuff. I'm just the patterns girl. ;> Also I'm not so much an expert on what women should do to meet men, except that pretty much all you have to do is walk into the local JUG or LUG to get started.


    See! I just knew you'd forget all about the WUG! So fo ahead and ask me what the WUG is... okay, then, I'll tell ya. The W stands for WebSphere. And we got us a really hot one in the good ole RTP.
    I've been to the JUG... and they charge us 5 bucks to get in. At the WUG they always have good eats for free and hot topics like implementations of Struts, Tiles, and JSF!
    I got no clue what a LUG is... doesn't it hold the wheels on your car?
    And yes, we really do need to finally get around to implementation. That's what pays the rent around these here parts. There's always gonna be someone wanting to see a proof of concept. Ya got any patterns for throwing together a POC Lady Soul?
     
    Howard Kushner
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:

    Hmm, in that case you'll need to mistake me for a turtle, or sprout wings and go flying around singing selections from La Traviata. ;>


    Are you making fun of Terrapins? Cuz I'm mighty proud of my Maryland football and basketball teams. They have established quite a pattern of winning. And then they get to date those cute cheerleaders (sigh)...
    And I just gotta ask you women what y'all think about the men basketball players in those tank tops and baggy shorts? Course I'd much rather watch women play basketball. They usually play most games better than men.
     
    pioneer
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:

    Hmm, in that case you'll need to mistake me for a turtle, or sprout wings and go flying around singing selections from La Traviata. ;>
    solveig


    But Ilja is one of a kind ! And no Johnnie-come-lately either

    --My fav song currently.(I wonder why).Think Rugby.
    regards
    [ December 05, 2003: Message edited by: HS Thomas ]
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Sadly, I have not come across any wugs here -- there's just a Weblogic User Group in town and they call it BEA.
    LUG is Linux User Group where I go to chat about my OpenOffice.org stuff (it runs on Windows too, just making sure everyone remembers ;> ).
    Am heading to the Denver JUG next Wednesday with Kathy and Bert -- they're going to talk about Head First EJBs and I'm going to spend 5 minutes on DDP.
    Solveig

    Originally posted by Howard Kushner:

    See! I just knew you'd forget all about the WUG! So fo ahead and ask me what the WUG is... okay, then, I'll tell ya. The W stands for WebSphere. And we got us a really hot one in the good ole RTP.
    I've been to the JUG... and they charge us 5 bucks to get in. At the WUG they always have good eats for free and hot topics like implementations of Struts, Tiles, and JSF!
    I got no clue what a LUG is... doesn't it hold the wheels on your car?
    And yes, we really do need to finally get around to implementation. That's what pays the rent around these here parts. There's always gonna be someone wanting to see a proof of concept. Ya got any patterns for throwing together a POC Lady Soul?

     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    Re proof of concept, a friend and self proclaimed head of the reference implementation program wrote to me last sunday very excitedly about a very successful microarchitecture of Interested Listener, Fifth Position Break, and Cary Grant Helper. Also Disinterested Requester came from real life implementations so I'm merely documenting that.
    Solveig
     
    Ilja Preuss
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    Originally posted by Solveig Laura Haugland:

    Hmm, in that case you'll need to mistake me for a turtle, or sprout wings and go flying around singing selections from La Traviata. ;>


    So are you saying you are *not* a turtle???
    I am working on the wings; but singing - well, I don't think so...
     
    Solveig Laura Haugland
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    I'm a tortoise, so the turtle thing would be a big faux pas. ;>
    Solveig

    Originally posted by Ilja Preuss:

    So are you saying you are *not* a turtle???
    I am working on the wings; but singing - well, I don't think so...

     
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