I'm not convinced that posting the same request in several different forums will solve your problem(s) any quicker
Without going into your task any deeper, first issue would how much are you prepared to pay?
If you have deep pockects then the world is yours and there are any number of web servers available
otherwise take the apache/tomcat road as they are free!
Also have you checked poolman?
http://sourceforge.net/projects/poolman/ for your connection pooling issue